Your Marriage Can Work Episode 7 Unhealed Wound Part 2

Your Marriage Can Work  

Episode 7

Unhealed wound Part 2

I Welcome you to the continuation of our discussion from the last edition, Unhealed Wound PT 1.

Let us listen to what Jesus meant from this verse.

Matthew 18:15.

15 “If another believer (your spouse inclusive) SINS (HURT) AGAINST YOU (not you sinned against him/her), GO PRIVATELY and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back."

As we continued from where we stopped last week. The above verse was Jesus' voice to all believers which includes couples. He said, When someone sinned against you, (that person may be your spouse), go to him/her and speak to the person. If the person accepts his/her fault, Jesus said you have won him (your marriage) back. 

Speak to your spouse first.

Speaking to the person is the first step not speaking to someone outside your marriage. You don't go out to explain to a third party before speaking to your spouse, No, speak to him/her first. Malice is not the remedy for hurt but speaking out with love and understanding. Many times we don't seek redress, but we want to be redressed by others. Remember, what you worked on is what will work. When you don't work on your marriage you may remain as a separated parent and if you still refuse to work on your single parenting life you may still lose all that you think you have left.

When you are not being promoted in your office what do you do? You go for further study, take some certification all because others are passing by you and you're being left behind static. It's very easy to find solutions to wounds in our places of work compared to our homes.

Forgiveness is the next Key

Forgiveness is the key. Many of us have reasons to walk away from our places of work but we stayed back and worked on ourselves regardless of people's attitude. We healed the wound and attended to the pain but in our marriages, the reverse is the case. We want to be healed by others without trying to heal ourselves. We want others to forgive us or keep forgiving us repeatedly but we are not ready to forgive at all. We want to remain the "holy art thou always" and think the marriage will work itself out, no you work on what you have to make it work. Heal your wound by forgiving one another will turn your wound to scars without pain. Your marriage can work if you are ready to work on it. Every wound is meant to heal by administering the right treatment and gradually turns to scar as time goes on. You don't cut off that wounded area from your body, you attend to it. Let forgiveness and humility take its place in your heart then to your spouse and heal your marriage. 

Divorce don't heal wounds

Divorce is not a medication for wounded marriage, there are other remedies. That is why you see a divorcee still nursing anger at will against their ex because their wound wasn't healed. They only left their ex but the wound has gone deeper than they can handle.

Have we asked ourselves how Adam and Eve later moved on after they were cursed and sent out of the Garden of Eden because of what Eve did? They Forgave themselves and moved on with the positive side of their marriage. If they had gone their separate ways then, they would have no partners and the intention of God would have been defeated. Hear me, when that marriage collapses you have frustrated the intention of God for your home. When you dwell on hurt and refuse to forgive you are telling God He doesn't know what He is doing.

Start with forgiveness, seek God's face and get to the root of all. Start healing the wound by speaking out in humility, add forgiveness and let your heart be healed from the wound and the pain. Before you know what, it becomes a scar that you will remember later and you will thank God you made the right decision.

See you in the next episode.

By: Joy & Emmanuel Oluboye